I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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