Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize
