He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
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Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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