Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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