i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
