What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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