So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he thought i was a dude.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
