If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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