I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize