my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Randomize
