I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
