fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
