Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
