god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
