Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
