dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
be right there i have to get my cape
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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