i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
