Already got asked if we're dating
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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