New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
