Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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