Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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