Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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