super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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