Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
operation harelip BJ is a go
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize