He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
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You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
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I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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