i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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