she takes plan B like it's going out of style
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
