North Korea, Best Korea!
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
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