I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Found your dick twin last night
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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