I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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