my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
