hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
