I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
We had sex on a dog bed..
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
