She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Randomize
