What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
