Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
