I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
