Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
