idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
So much Jack, so little girl.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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