Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize