He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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