***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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