In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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