That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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