I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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