I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Randomize
