I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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