Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Gross. gingers suck

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  (313): Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you (248): Gross. gingers suck http://tfl.nu/yt8q
  Replies (18) Good night (1301) Bad night (1928)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person

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  (248): I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person http://tfl.nu/uj7d
  Replies (13) Good night (3779) Bad night (823)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.

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  (504): As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them. http://tfl.nu/apo9
  Replies (3) Good night (653) Bad night (3969)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  I love having hate sex.

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  (705): I love having hate sex. http://tfl.nu/fz63
  Replies (43) Good night (5384) Bad night (907)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring

  (989): View more from Michigan

  i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me

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  (231): my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring (989): i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me http://tfl.nu/18pl
  Replies (21) Good night (7045) Bad night (1169)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.

  (254): View more from Texas

  Tornado warnings are fun!

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  (254): Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows. (254): Tornado warnings are fun! http://tfl.nu/9sqb
  Replies (13) Good night (3412) Bad night (1186)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.

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  (870): Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good. http://tfl.nu/i8bn
  Replies (3) Good night (2439) Bad night (732)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring

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  (269): They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring http://tfl.nu/up4a
  Replies (4) Good night (1755) Bad night (855)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried

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  (978): my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried http://tfl.nu/4pug
  Replies (3) Good night (1192) Bad night (416)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do

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  (508): Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do http://tfl.nu/ic6g
  Replies (2) Good night (775) Bad night (424)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?

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  (217): Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter? http://tfl.nu/zu2a
  Replies (0) Good night (573) Bad night (355)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.

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  (717): So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA. http://tfl.nu/qkjv
  Replies (3) Good night (1185) Bad night (622)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it

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  (301): If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it http://tfl.nu/2kea
  Replies (0) Good night (412) Bad night (123)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems

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  (403): hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems http://tfl.nu/kiwx
  Replies (1) Good night (183) Bad night (283)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.

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  (205): According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it. http://tfl.nu/zas8
  Replies (1) Good night (344) Bad night (124)

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