i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
