What did we do last night that was yellow?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
