She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
